It was twenty sixteen; you wouldn’t think there would still be decapitation. They went through different kinds of capital punishment methods, none of which really matched the degree of humanity that they once claimed that they would a achieve. Some states went so far as to ban the death penalty completely. Most of Europe had already banned the practice.

But there was a new tide coming, that revealed a dark secret kingdom that was best left hidden from the world. The Anna-Marie I knew in high school, was very much a different one from the one in Alsace. But she would still have memories of the time that she was beheaded by guillotine, her crying out to asking me to save her neck. Even still I wondered why it was even thought I could go into her dreams, what made me stop and reconsider.

And now I live with the regret.

I puffed a joint into the starry night.

I didn’t think I’d fall in love with a parricidal girl. I didn’t even think a cis girl would have a thing for trans woman.

Being trans wasn’t exactly a convenient thing, or trendy, if you’re living in one of the more conservative states of the union. We met in our freshman year, though eventually she started seeing other people. The boys started demanding things from her, so she was quick to break off unhealthy relationships. I never quite know how she was able to easily switch from one lover to the next, but in all cases she always came back to me.

She knew that I would be there, to give her a shoulder. She would talk about what happened. I knew that her father was "Un Sac de douche", and from time to time she would have trouble with law enforcement. Being an immigrant, it put her in a tricky situation do to Obama’s and later Trumps immigration policies. I was one that she knew she could trust.

She knew that my dad dropped his job working as a short order cook, when he was offered lots of money to cut people’s heads off. Before that the "guillotine family" had newly brought their method of state execution, that had previously only been used in France. But expanded to their new territories when Marine Le Pen renewed French imperialism.

Eventually it came down to this, we trusted each other more than anyone else. Out of anything else, what bothered me the most about having her in another plain of existence: the lust was overpowering. The sensations of lust mixed with overwhelming despair. That feeling of hopelessness that only ever achieved full fruition when you realize you’ve met the love of your life, and simply no longer have the option to express it.

It was time to die:

Danse, the rhythms of death,

In this Kingdom by the hidden sea.

For me and my Anna-Marie.

The final epitaph of the damned.

I heard the sound of my father screaming in the kitchen, he jerked me across the room. He didn’t much like the idea of his daughter dating someone that they would eventually have to execute by guillotine. It was one of the most difficult decisions of my life.

But I wanted her, I wanted her now.

I wanted her as my wife.